Jock's Jocks

Bingo: Thursday Night, Heads Down at 8:00. That short and to-the-point statement emblazons the sign that sits outside the Inverloch Bowls Club. I forgot to go in the end, but it would have been satisfying to go home with a frozen chook or a meal voucher for the local pub after a fast and furious night's bingo.

I'm doing my teaching rounds at the moment and so far I've been having a hoot; although my intake of bad instant coffee has increased dramatically, however that comes with the territory. Yep, International Roast and Nescafe Blend 43 are still here not because they taste delicious, but they are the lifeblood of school staffrooms all around Australia.

My class is great. They are all lovely kids and there's some bright cookies there too. However being new at this there is one thing I've found hard and that is being serious when required. Lots of stuff amuses me and here's a little example.
One afternoon the class had their weekly religious instruction teacher come in for half an hour and do her thing. I thought I'd make the most of this time and sit in the front corner at my laptop and type up a lesson plan for the next day. It went well until right at the end. The religious instruction teacher was reading out a passage from their exercise books, and at the end of every passage the class recited a certain line. I think it was something like, "He will always love us." I thought nothing of it, that is until they started to hold the 'sss' sound at the end of this passage. For some reason I smirked, but I composed myself and turned back to my lesson plan. Before I knew it, they repeated the passage again and this time it was "He will always love usss." I found this a little more amusing, however being a religious class it was supposed to be serious and I was not helping. The teacher read out another passage, and this time I dreaded what would come next. "He will always love ussssssss;" this time I giggled and they knew they had me. I was supposed to be Mr Hutton here, a trainee teacher who was trying his hardest to do all the right things and this was about to come undone. "He will always love usssssss." It took every bit of my concentration not to smirk; I thought of sad things, I thought of a waterfall, I tried so hard, but it was just too funny and I giggled again, going bright red. I was trying really hard to concentrate on my work but out of the corner of my eye I could see heads turning and smiles on faces. They held me to ransom for another 30 seconds, and once it was over I was exhausted, having put every ounce of energy into not laughing for the rest of the exercise.
However it was the first genuine laugh I'd had for ages, and the amusement came from doing something that I love, and that is being a primary school teacher. I think I've found my calling, plus I can fart in the classroom and walk off and before I know it the kids are squabbling amongst themselves as to who the culprit is. Who would suspect the teacher?